Family | Mommy Head Adventures

In Sickness and In Health

When Daddy Head and I stood before family and friends on August 4 of 2007, we spoke the traditional vows at our covenant ceremony. We had spent weeks in pre-marital counseling with our pastors, his parents, and we were well versed in what we were committing to. We broke down every statement and knew that what we were saying could not be taken lightly.

And over the course of our 5 1/2 year marriage, one part of our vows has truly been put to the test:

In sickness and in health.

When it took me 10 months to get pregnant for the first time.
When our daughter was diagnosed with a rare form of seizures, Infantile Spasms, at 5 1/2 months and doctors said she may never live a normal life.
When I became pregnant with our second child right in the midst of Lilibeth’s health battle.
When Lilibeth because so malnourished due to a side effect of her seizure medicine and my lack of breast milk that we almost lost her.
When I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes during my second pregnancy.
When Ryan was born with Down syndrome.
When doctors said Lili may never talk.
When I gained entirely too much weight during my third pregnancy and was diagnosed glucose intolerant or pre-diabetic.

And these are just the big things! Each of them tested our faith in our God and our faith in one another.

Just recently, I was reminded of the weight of these words as we have been battling over my husband’s health. What appears to have been a viral infection followed up by strep throat has left my husband continually sick for nearly a month.

Every morning I wake up hoping that today is the day he will feel better. And every morning I am told he still feels run down, sick and tired.

But I am choosing to love him. I cut a covenant with him on that beautiful day in August and I promised him that in sickness and in health I would be here.

It gets hard, yes, especially when Lili has been whining and Ryan is dealing with a fungal infection. Or when I am in the midst of night weaning the baby and could really use a nap.

But part of being a unit is working together. When one struggles, the other takes up the slack. Daddy Head has done it for me so many times and we have done it together over the health of our children. And I will continue to do it for him until that morning when he wakes up better, and every day beyond that.

Why?

Because that is what a covenant is. It is committing to something and never ever backing down. It is making the ultimate promise with no ability of being broken.

When Jesus came to this earth, he cut a covenant with us on the cross, and since my marriage is to be a living example of His relationship with the church, it is my desire to walk out every statement that I made on that August day.

Plus, love is not just a feeling. It is a choice. And, honestly, the choice is easy when your husband is as good as mine is!

Let’s talk:

What part of your marriage vows have you seen significantly played out in your marriage?
Have you been facing any battles lately that I can sow some prayer for you over?
Will you take a moment and pray for our little family, especially that Daddy Head would get better?

Filed Under: family, marriage

It is okay to feel hurt

9 May By Mommy Head 3 Comments

Last week I shared with you that I have been deeply impacted by the book The Beautiful Wife. It has truly been one of those books that when I see it just sitting on my end table, it brings a smile to my face. The freedom that I have received from that book pales in comparison to many other things.

One true revelation came forth after a morning of discord between Daddy Head and I. Looking back on that day, I can’t even remember what the problem was about. I just know something happened and I was angry.

I have learned in our 5 1/2 years of marriage that if I get to a place of extreme anger, it is due to the fact that I have been keeping hurts buried deep inside. So it came as no surprise to me when Daddy Head asked me, “Why do you always go to the place of anger? Why can’t you just do what the Bible says and not let the sun go down on your anger?”

And that morning, I told him the same thing I always do, “I don’t know…”

Later that afternoon, I was reading chapter four, Cultivating Mystique when Sandy Ralya shared how she always felt that she was only good enough until something better came along. She told a story from her childhood and how her best friend suddenly didn’t want to be friends anymore since the “cool crowd” took her into their group. This left her crushed and hurt.

It was at this moment when I had my epiphany. I suddenly was young and remembered many instances where I was taught that when an adult corrected you or hurt you, even if I felt they were wrong, it was never my place to tell them that. It was up to me to pray and let God show them.

That always left me feeling very: ANGRY!

See the same pattern?

I can honestly say that at that moment, I understood why I always had that anger pattern. When my husband or any other authority in my life did something to hurt me, instead of telling them like an adult woman should, I would just bottle it up inside and then eventually explode, mostly on my husband because he was the safe person to let it go on.

I felt like the Lord was showing me that I could break this cycle and pattern by enacting His Word in the situation and not letting the sun go down on my anger. I was free to tell those that hurt me how I was feeling and by doing that, I could keep from going to the anger.

I have had many opportunities over these past few weeks as we have dealt with sickness in our home to do this with Daddy Head and it has been truly freeing. I haven’t went through the anger cycle like I used to and when I feel myself getting ready to go there, I stop and analyze what I have been keeping hidden. I then calmly bring it to the light so that I can keep from being hurt and hurting others.

Things to ponder:

Do you have a similar issue from your growing up years that causes you to have a repeat cycle on anger?
Have you asked the Lord to show you the hidden things of your heart so that He can deal with them and make you into a more whole person?
How do you best deal during sticky situations with your spouse or other authorities and are you open to letting Jesus show you how to best handle them?

Filed Under: family, marriage, memories

Happy Birthday Benjamin: A Supernatural Birth

11 Apr By Mommy Head 1 Comment

I can hardly believe that it was a year ago that that picture was taken! Little baby Banana has officially graduated to “big boy” status.

And to celebrate his big day, I figured I should share with you his supernatural birth story. I realized I never did that before, and I want to give praise and glory where it is due.

So, without further adieu, here is how baby Ben came to be.

*****

April 8th came and went. I was so done being pregnant and was felling just a little bit of pressure to get this baby out. My mother-in-law and doula was set to travel that coming weekend, so we went into the dr office on Monday the 9th ready to make a plan.

I had the dr strip my cervix in hopes that would get things going. I received my orders to go do some walking and resting and see if little baby would decide to come. If I had any kind of regular contractions, come in and we will break my water. If not, we will induce on Wednesday or Thursday.

I didn’t want to be induced…

Nothing really picked up that night. I walked. I went to bed and nothing. A tiny bit of bleeding but that was from my hard check. I was only a 1-2 so we had awhile it appeared.

I had a steady round of contractions the next morning but in deciding if we should go or not, it stopped. And I cried.

I was done with being pregnant, and I was determined to get the baby out. But he/she needed to cooperate.

That evening at our family dinner, Daddy Head cancelled worship practice. It was almost as if we knew we were gonna have this baby. But I just needed to start having some contractions…

At about 8:30, I started to have some contractions, but they weren’t that big of a deal. I mean, I have felt labor contractions before and these were just babies. But we decided to time them.

They were anywhere from 5-10 minutes apart. Not really consistent but we made our decision… We were going in.

We got to the hospital and they ushered me in. I was examined, told I was at a 4 and hooked up to the monitors. Baby was having a hard time with the contractions so the flipping began.

And this is where things go supernatural.

Let me explain. I am afraid of being on my left side while in labor. With both of my first births, when I was told to lay on my left side, the contractions became so strong I could barely breath. I was set against using pain meds, so this was ultimately the battle that I knew I would have to fight.

I wanted my baby to be okay. We had been through 2 traumatic births already, so when the heart rate kept dropping, I had to fight to keep from freaking out. So, from side to side I went.

When that didn’t fix things, my dr said give me oxygen. With birth number 2, this made me very nauseous so I didn’t want to. But once again, I wanted my baby to come out okay so I did what I was told.

At this point, I have been at the hospital for about an hour or 2. My contractions were not taking on a regular pattern like we had hoped so I was checked again. I was at a 7.

Really? I can do this!

But baby’s heart rate keeps dropping with every inconsistent contraction. I know that everyone was thinking the dreaded c word. But I was determined to get baby here without that.

Now they suggested fluids. I said hook me up if you think it will help. And help it did!

My little mover finally was able to handle the contractions. I must have been a little dehydrated.

My dr came in and checked me again. I was an 8. Not much longer. I asked them to go ahead and break my water. It was a hope that it might make my contractions consistent and pick things up.

I knew it was a long shot since my water breaking in my first 2 labors did nothing for me. Same story here.

I kept flipping and breathing my oxygen. When the nausea hit, I knew we were close. My dr stayed with me and checked again. I was at a 8-9 with just a little lip around the head. He told me to go ahead and push.

I pushed a few times to just see if that would help. The lip decreased and he said lets get ready.

Give it a big push.

STOP!!!

The head is out!

Wait…I never felt that!

Less than 5 minutes later, at 3:43 am, my 9 pound 1.7 ounce baby was here. He was 22 1/2 inches long and every bit my son.

The awesome thing about Ben’s birth was how God brought my through. My mother-in-law always jokes about how I didn’t have enough contractions to have a baby. They never really got regular.

Add to that the fact I could tolerate being on my side and the nausea from the oxygen didn’t get to me, and I have to chalk that up as a pretty supernatural birth!

*****

Baby Ben, I am so glad you are here and a part of our family! Every day you change and grow and teach us more about raising a child. You are such a joy and we thank God for you!

Here’s to the next year of your life! More talking and soon walking and before we know it, you will be really grown!

Filed Under: brother sister, family, Family Friday

Head Shoulders Knees and Toes #FamFunFriday

9 Aug By Mommy Head Leave a Comment

Welcome to the first week of Family Fun Friday here on Mommy Head Adventures. I have teamed up with Frontline Moms to bring you this super easy and incredibly fun weekly link up.

The rules are simple. All you need to do is write up a post that is family friendly and fun. Here are a few ideas:

Fun Crafts
Fun Recipes
Fun Family Outings
Fun Mom Games, or,
Funny Stories of Your Family

Really, just about anything goes! We would love it if you would add our Family Fun Button to your post, which can be found on the sidebar. This way, more people can come over and have some fun with us.

Be sure to use the hashtag #FamFunFriday so we can keep track of your posts on Twitter. You may even see your post show up on the MHA Facebook page or pinned on my Family Friday Pinterest board. Be sure to give them both a follow.

Now for my Family Fun:

photo source

About a week ago, I was having a grand time at my in-laws’ house. Daddy Head and I spend a lot of time over there since he is the oldest of 10 children. There really is never a dull moment in our lives.

This particular night, as we spent time bonding over the Olympics, we came to a shocking discovery. There was a discrepancy over the lyrics to the old children’s rhyme, “Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes.”

The problem came at the bridge. You know the line: “Eyes and Ears and Mouth and Nose.” Well, when Bear insisted I sing it and her aunt do the motions, it was then the issue came to the surface. Her dear aunt was sure it was, “eyes and ears and nose and mouth.”

I assured her that I was right, and she assured me that she was. It was how they had always sang it. And that sinking feeling you get when you realize that you may have been betrayed your whole life hit me like a ton of bricks. Could my elementary school teachers have lead me astray?

After a quick Google search, we found out that the rhyme was exactly that, a rhyme.

And I could sleep peacefully at night knowing that my years of singing the song were not in vain. The book the kids loved to “read,”the cute one with the bear doing the motions, was not wrong after all!

Filed Under: Blog HOP, family, Family Friday, humor Tagged With: Family Fun Friday

Where I’ve Been {Baby Update and a Visit}

26 Apr By Mommy Head 5 Comments

Yes, it is true! I am still alive. I know you have been seeing a lot of pictures and not as many other posts lately, but this little one is taking up a lot of my time:

Isn’t he just the cutest thing?

Between nursing and changing poopy diapers, there has just hardly been any time to do anything else. But I haven’t forgot about you guys. You are each near and dear to my heart. And I want to be sure to share great things with you besides cute pictures of my family

A few things that you can look forward to in the very near future is some great reviews on a few products that I have had the opportunity to test out, as well as a few giveaways. One of them is a huge giveaway. So huge, in fact, there are 3 winners. And all three will be winning an Amazon GC!

Speaking of Amazon GC’s, I got a great visit this past week in my email inbox. About a week after our return from Banana’s birth, the Fairy Hobmother from Appliances Online graced me with their presence and bestowed upon me a gift card to use on whatever I want. I am having a hard time deciding what to spend it on. Diapers? Portable DVD player for the car? Sewing books?

Whatever I decide to use it on will be fun, I assure you. And, if you are a blogger, be sure to leave me a comment letting me know what you would use the gc for if the Fairy Hobmother visited you. You just might get a visit from them as well!

Disclosure: I wrote this post just to let you know how things were going in my life. The gc was a nice bonus to mention, but it in no way influenced or changed my views

Filed Under: adventures, bonding, brother sister, family, feeding