 |
A few weeks back during one of our weekly visits to St Louis for the kids therapy, I witnessed a phone interaction between Daddy Head and his dad. I listened in wonder to Daddy Head’s side of the conversation, wondering how he did it.
You see, Daddy Head works for his father at our church. He does a lot of different jobs, but one in particular is dealing with the publishing company that publishes my mother in law’s books. He was supposed to fax something important to them that he ran out of time to do.
As Daddy Head explained what happened, I began to cringe on the inside. Had it been me instead of him, I would be holding back the tears, so sure that my father in law would be disappointed and angry with me. But Daddy Head didn’t seem to be struggling like that.
So, what did I do? After the phone conversation ended, I asked Daddy Head how he felt. When he said fine, I was amazed. I then asked the question that I needed to know the answer to:
How in the world do you not feel insecurity and rejection after something like that? How can you not be in tears and crying because your Dad is upset. Wait, is your dad upset?
Daddy Head explained that he knew he was fully accepted by his father. He knew his dad was upset that the fax wasn’t sent, but he wasn’t mad. It would get done and they would apologize for the delay.
I learned a valuable lesson that day that I want to pass on to you.
When you see someone that is secure and has this area under control, be willing to ask them the hard questions going through your mind! It helps to know how they process their situations so that you can learn and imitate what they do. This is key to getting insecurity under control.
What questions should you be asking others? Share in the comments and maybe we can help each other!
Be sure to find the other posts in this series under the Insecurity Fast tab.
|
I have seen this interaction between Pastor Doug and his kids as well as Pastor Doug’s interaction with my own children, and it never ceases to amaze me. I would have reacted in much the same way as you described. My stomach would have been tied up in knots, I would have apologized 10,000 times, been upset the rest of the day and unable to focus on anything else, and then I would have rushed back to the church the minute I got home and faxed that information off before calling Pastor Doug and apologizing another 10,000 times. I read your post yesterday also, and I guess my question is…..how do you deal with people that feed your insecurity(often as a means of control) but that you cannot distance yourself from???